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i had an awesome weekend.
let me start at the beginning.
on saturday i went to paganfest at the DNA lounge (check up on their troubles - they could be shut down! SAVE DNA!!!)
omfg the band were awesome. they all seemed to be having a great time, like a ginormous party. cormorant, blackguard, swashbuckle, moonshadow, primordial, and korpiklaani all have a new fan in me.
sunday i went to gilman to see my friends Plan 9. 45 grave also played there... they... aged.
then. *boom* everything fell to shit. i was being harassed about not contributing to the household (i forgot to send in the papaerwork for food stamps, so i no longer recieve them.) so i'm supposed to get my food stamp thing going again. the thing is... i'm planning to go to VA in july. so why should i waste my time doing this horrible thing to get food stamps for one month? then when i come back, face the chance of having to do it again? i was called selfish for this. i think that they think i'm never coming back? or that all my talk of going to va is just talk? how the fuck is it selfish? idk.
why am i going to va? because a person i love lives there. i miss him. i miss my cat and my stuff. not only that, he's going to teach me to drive. my plan is to 1. learn to drive 2. make some money (let's hear it for exotic dancing) 3. come back with a car, money in my pocket, and more opportunities. this benefits EVERYONE. in my head, this all works out just fine. not to mention, it would do us all good for me to be away for a bit. lately, there's been so much tension in the house, it's suffocating me. i'd rather be asleep and face my nightmares than have to keep struggling with life.
sounds good to me.
how come going to greece on tour with brocas helm is somehow different from me going to va to get my shit together?
hey, i'd stay here, or make my va trip shorter if anyone would help me learn to drive quickly, and basically hold my hand through the task of finding a job dancing. but no one here has that kind of resources or patience with me. my tyty does.
so fuck you, that's what i'm doing.
i'm not leaving forever! my life is here! the things i'm planning to do are going to make life better for everyone!
IT'S NOT SELFISH.
besides, why does everyone get to be selfish but me? that is patently unfair.
w/e
on another note, i plan on doing several girl/girl shoots for my site before i leave. yeys.

~soma~