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This is Thomas, my Florida frog. He has replaced the awesome pit bull pup I left back home when I came out here to do some exploring.

I've been missing my familiar, and just as Emily Dickinson said "Narcotics cannot still the tooth which nibbles at the soul."

I found myself in the need of some animal companion.

That's when I saw Thomas,

Hey,I have a new set up.  Also this was sent to me last night from JM Darling.  When we were shooting my sets last month I forgot he took this while we were in Chick-fil-A. 

When JM Darling and I met up to shoot, we decided to combine my love of history with our shoot, so we went to the Ft. Caroline monument in Jacksonville so I could see the site of an epic historical battle I write about in my novel, and I could get naked amidst the spanish moss and jungle ferns of the national park its attached to.

I'm talking

So I've been in Florida traveling to different sites of the fountain of youth for a magazine article, and doing some research for a novel I'm writing.  I also got to shoot my sets for God's Girls with JM Darling.  Here's some fun little vids taken between a few sets.

Also, Charlie took some pictures of me at her gallery show last week. She had all of her portraits up and had a light studio to take pictures of people that came to the show.  I decided to put one leg up for the camera:

I was recently down in SoCal visiting my moms and had arranged to have a little meet up with my twitter friend Adam Bravin/ DJ Adam12 of She Wants Revenge fame (among other things).  He's going to be shooting a set for me and we thought it was time to meet up and you know, just get to know each other. 

<----This Guy.  He's on this site.  Go say hi.  They're also on myspace.com/shewantsrevenge.

Firstly I had to arrive at this date outing, which for me sucked ballz, because I hate driving, and I had to drive through L.A. traffic from the Inland Empire (a.k.a the shittiest place evar), to his place.  My car was only recently wrested back from my X who is in jail for violating.  The consoles all effed up and the air conditioning done got broken.  We're in the middle of a heatwave the rivals Satan's taint, BTW.

But I got there.  I effing got there god damn it!

I was an hour early, so he was all sleepy when he came down and let me into his air conditioned abode.  I was all jittery and anxious from the harrowing drive through light and pleasant traffic (I'm a neurotic, what can I say?  I was tripping on how bad the traffic COULD have been).

He made hiz self some coffee and told me the whole history of Intelligentsia Coffee...other stuff.  We talked of awesomeness that will be making its way into a lovely write up/interview soon.  So I had to get the lulz out here, for you guys. 

After a couple hours of talking, we decided we were hungry.   Sooooo.  We got in his car and headed for burgers.  He played a song for me that SWR had just finished for a movie and talked about their upcoming tour in September, and how touring works and why they'll never come to Fresno.  Or as we natives call it, The Pit of Ultimate Darkness.

A photographer named Tony Stamolis made us famous with a coffee table book called Frezno:

He's also doing some stuff with Chase Lisbon, Merkely???, Bob Coulter and others on a free site called flngs.com.  They keep blogs and have little slide shows to sort of get you acquainted with their work.  If you're curious about his other stuff, you should check it out.

So he took me to the "best burger in L.A.", which is top secret.  I'm allowed to refer to it as the P&B.  I guess you L.A. ppl wiil find this of special significance.  I really wasn't that impressed with the burgers, because I've eaten at Irene's, and anyone that has eaten at Irene's can tell you, you'll never eat another burger and feel the same about it again.

In his defense he did claim that it was the best burger in L.A., not the world and I order mine without the Thousand Island.  He said that next time he would have to clear all ingredients with me before taking me to the best of anything else.  Apparently its the sauce that makes it the best, which I don't' understand cause Thousand Island is effing gross. 

It's the mayo.  I know as a white person, I should love it, but while I did grow up in a double wide trailer in Firebaugh, I also grew up in Fresno.  Which means that I came with a Spanish accent, a love of beans and rice, an enormous ass, and a propensity for fist fights, along with a tendency to cry out things like "Aye Papi" during sex.

I played soccer as a child and I sport my team Mexico warm ups proudly.

Note the booty proudly wearing said team Mexico warmups:

I digress.

So we get back in the car when we're done there and he asks me where I want to go.

I blurt out, "I want to see teh place where they found the Black Dahlia's severed body!"

What can I say, I'm a fucking charmer.

Let me explain:

When I was fifteen I developed an obsession with the case of the Black Dahlia.  I've read every book about it.  Srs.  Cause what's hotter than dead chics?  (somewhere out there a sociopath thought "Killing chics!" but it wasn't me.)

Unfortunately, Adam didn't know where this was right off the bat, so we drove by the Chateau Marmont where John Belushi killed himself, then the Viper Room where River Phoenix died.  Still this wasn't satisfying to me, so we ended up buying a star map.  We quickly determined that the neighborhood we were looking for was too dangerous for his car....which while black, wasn't a hearse, but something nicer that ppl on crack would like to jack. 

So we headed to the Manson house, where he took my picture.  I know.  I look hideous without makeup, but still insist on not wearing it most of the time because I have no idea how to put it on.  Just look at those epic titties.  Don't they look nice and ripe?

It was up in the hills and secluded with this strange death defyingly narrow driveway with other houses on either side of it.  As we were leaving I notices some dragon like sculptures on the porch of one of the houses.  I asked him if he knew about the Reptilians.  This led into a discussion about the illumnati and a great conspiratorial nerdgasm ensued as we discussed the dark hand of THE MAN. 

We then drove by the place where Janis Joplin overdosed.  We're going to see about booking the same room for when he shoots my set.  See, goth isn't a propensity for dark clothing and Halloween store goodies.  Its a state of mind that creeps surreptitiously across the brain, sliding down the saggital groove of your left and right hemispheres and making a gooey nest in your brain stem, infecting all of your thoughts with these inappropriate and macabre thoughts. 

There's just no place for us in this world.

I digress, (again).

I had to go to the bathroom bad, So then we went to the recording studio the band built.  It was a nice little set up, I stared longingly at the machines.  Magnets Large& Small, the studio Milkmaid records out of has many similar devices.  I am impressed by them and their gloriousness.

We went to Hollywood Forever, which is close by, and stalked around the graves of movie stars I'd never heard of because that was during the silent film era.  Some family rolled their eyes at Adam when he tried to drive past them.  They were CLEARLY in the way, and CLEARLY not really related to Joey Ramone, who's grave they were standing in front of. 

Adam took some pics and then we got right the fuck out of there.

We ended up at El Compadre somehow.  I think it was because we passed the one on Sunset and I was like, "I knew this grade A fuck twat actor guy that would always take me there."

Note the fucking charm that spills forth from my lips.  (also, why does actor nearly always=douche bag?  Adam and I did discuss this at length.)

Then we started talking about margaritas, and well, eventually it was decided we needed to stop in and have a few.  They were delicious and the server looked like he'd just been paroled for murdering pregnant women in and around Juarez.  I'm just saying.  The authorities might want to look into it. 

Eventually we'd had enough and the sun was starting to set, and my mother called wanting to be reassured I hadn't been murdered by some weird sex killer.

"Mom, he's in Wikipedia, its' alright," I said.

"So is Robert Blake and Phil Spector." 

She had a point.  Who was this man I was riding around with all day looking at famous crime scenes with?

<----Effing Hollywood.

So it was time for our date to come to an end (fuck you, he bought me food and drove me around, that = a date).  Before I left he gave me a riding crop he got at a party hosted by the fetish company that made all the stuff for Eyes Wide Shut. (I took it as a sign of his undying devotion).  I immediately went home and put it in a DIY for you guyz!

Sadly, I left the star map in his car.  (;_;)  Now I'll never know where Frankie Munoz lives.  Whoever that is.  Adam's probably having boat drinks with him right now. 

ZOMGZ!

My first set for God's Girls went live this week.  Thank you so much for all the love you showed.  If I die tomorrow, I want you all to know, that I wanted to have secks with all of you at some point, but not all at once, that would be too, too much.

In a final note.  I've decided I like the song Pokerface by Lady Gaga, because it sounds like she's saying "Fuck her face", which makes me think of her being faceraped by Marilyn Manson...which makes me happy.

So today I went to visit the La Brea Tar Pits.  There were lots of animatronic displays and children, which confused me, so for several long uncomfortable moments I thought I was at Chuck E Cheese's.  One girl was made to cry at the sound of the woolly mammoth, while another little boy was so overjoyed at the skeleton of the giant ground sloth

Someone compared my post last time to Eddie Izzard, so I thought I should look him up.  I watched Dress to Kill and realized that I used to have a picture of him in full makeup taped to my wall when I was a babe in arms.  I thought he was so frantic and blonde and I wanted him bad.  I love pretty boys, see my last post.

So halfway in he mentions

For some reason I feel like oversharing today and want people to know that I can do other stuff besides twitter and take my clothes off.  I write poetry sometimes too.  http://halffinishedheaven dot blogspot dot com.

That is all. 

XOXO.