Shea's journals

so this last weekend i.e friday,sat and sunday, were pretty eventful. I hung out with Chase on saturday night with my boyfriend and we went to a party at her friend's house. After that we went out to a diner at like 2 am and my fat ass had chicken fingers and a fruit salad. we talked about possibly moving into an apartment together in Nyack NY. Its a really cute town, tons of little shops, vegan & organic stores, amazing resturants and this really awesome buddhist/hippie art gallery/cafe/hang out spot. Me and Chris went back on Sunday to check the place out after having some greek food. The people that owned the place were super amazing and friendly. They talked to us for about 20 minutes, describing their dreams for the place. It is lovely, dimly lit, filled with tree carved buddha sculptures, Koi fish paintings, incense and Gold religious sculptures. The even sell watermelong slices at the cute little snack bar :) The place is called The Dharma Dicso & Art Gallery. Please check out their website at nyackbuddha.com. Heres a few pics of the place

After we went to the mall and my fat ass got a 12 oz. Orange Passion Fruit Mango Jamba Juice and a cookies and cream custard flurry thing. Mmm. Bought some more makeup in sephora ( well chris did for me <3) and then set out for the wonderful drive home back to staten island and away from my baby :(

Today though I have a doctors appointment and Im bummed. I dont feel like getting a cold thing shoved up my vag this morning. Ugh. Thursday is chris's bday and i still have to buy him a card and I am completely broke. I need to get on that asap. I already got him the kitten he wanted as a present so thats taken care of. well im off to get specculumed. Yay! After i make me some PB&J

xoxo Shea

ps ppl have asked me a list for a list of interests that isnt on my constant changing basis, they want the permanent shit. so here we go

1. v-necks with throat tattoos


2. american apparel


3. vegetarian spaghettios


4. Jamba Juice


5. Cold sheets


6. godsgirls.com


7. extensions


8. Juicy couture


9. the writings of aleister crowley and anton lavey


10. flannel


11. MAC makeup


12. buddhism


13. owls


14. expensive shit


15. agent provacteur lingerie


16. chaos


17. stilettos


18. strippers


19. cold hard cash


20. hustling


21. betsy johnson


22. sephora


23. Tarsiers


24. lol cats


25. texting


26. fucking


27. blogging


28. NYC


29. european bar hopping


30. black metal


31. GTFO

the other night at my boyfriend's tattoo artist's house i was sitting talking with my good friend grace about religion. I came to the conclusion that although christianity has always been a huge part of my unbringing, i tend to follow the teachings more of other philosophies. I dont like to call religion "religion" in my opinion its all philosophy. I gather bits and pieces of alot of religions to add to the collage that is my conscience. Satanism for example, teaches that the biggest sin you can commit is that of stupidity. i agree completely. Alot of non members and fans from my myspace page read my blog surprisingly which i did not know until people started making comments about it through myspace. You guys should join so when I get some naked pictures up you can cr33p those. But yeah anyway, back to the subject on hand, I think its pretty shitty how people judge you based on your lifestyle choice. So you want to live your life in black and white pressed face powder. who gives a shit. You get shuffles into a category and automatically ridiculed for being a devil worshipper. I know goths that are more christian that I will ever be. Im not gunna lie and say im a peaceful person, because im not. But  im not a complete cunt either. For the most part I enjoy chaos and mischeif making. Does this make me a bad person? Apparently to some people it does. I think its completely fucked up. Just because I pose nude on the internet that means I cannot support causes that are important to me, or find beauty in such religions as buddhism and taosim, just because they advocate complete peace and enlightenment. Does that make me a hypocrite? If it does then so be it. I find buddha sculptures beautiful and mystifying. Rosary beads and paintings of the virgin mary are beautiful also. So what if i find the writings of Anton La Vey( the founder of satanism)amazing and insightful? The poems of Aleister Crowley are more beautiful to me than some verses of the bible. When i get my apartment, its going to be full of buddha sculptures, paintings from ancient times, medical diagrams, bamboo plants. incense and candles. I have so many ideas i can hardly wait. ABC home is the most amazing place to shop for a new apartment, The store in NYC Is decorated beautfully. I also want drapes and taxidermy and huge body pillows everywhere. Instead of chairs i want giant pillows and Indian furniture, carved deep woods.  Im getting a girl boner just thinking about some of the stuff its gunna have. Anyway i need a job besides dancing naked. As soon as i start school again its gunna be like near impossible for  me to get a job during the day unless I take online courses to ease the stress so I can dance at night and work somewhere more professional during the day. All I know its my love for money is insatiable, I love expensive shit.. I am glutton. its terrible for my health. im the type of person who lives off of chinese food and has a million designer bags, gets her nails done every week and invests more in good makeup than good health insurance. My personal book collection is overflowing and growing. I like pretty things, pretty expensive hard to find things. i cant live without extravagance. books on ancient Knowledge. organic food and designer candles.  ugh i need cold hard cash to blow.

i want all of this in my belly now. i adopted a kitten yesterday :) its tiny and black, its names midnight but im going to change that its so unorinigal. i think the guy we got the kitten from stole my boyfriends sidekick though which kinda sucks but is kind of funny at the same time, because we were standing in front of him the whole time, so he had to be pretty fucking sneaky about it.  whatever. the day before that i went to the brooklyn animal shelter where they  put the animals to sleep after a certain amount of time, and it was so depressing looking at all the dogs that were probably gunna be put down. They were mostly pits, ranging from 2 to 3 years old. ugh

anyway i want to go to six flags and ride the new dark knight roller coaster. sucks that i cant ugh.

i want lots of hello kitty sushi in my belly. lots and lots but im gunna go settle for apple slices and strawberry orange juice. peace out

myspace.com/xstaycoldx

while im trying to figure who I am myself, heres a survey that lets you all know a little bit about me

Who AreYou

1. name: Shea Leigh  vance


2. zodiac sign: gemini


3. birth year : 1989


4. birth place : a university hospital on the beach in staten island


5. hometown: staten island


6. is your hometown a small cuty, a suburb,small town, rural town,etc.: suburb island


7. Highschool: port richmond highschool


8. Heritage:  greek/swedish

What do you look like

1. hair color:  i dont know anymore


2. eye color: hazel


3. skin tone: olive


4. face shape: ?


5. height: 5'6


6. weight: 110


7. shoe size: 7 1/2


8. clothing size: 0-3 depending on the store, small or extra small in dresses and regualr tshirts

What makes you tick

1. What aspect of your personality do you like best? Im honest, in your face and not afraid to voice my opinion. Im blunt, but not to the point where im a bitch, to the point where i stay real.


2. Which aspect of your personality do you like the least? When i get really stressed out, i can become quite hard to be around


3. What are some things about other people that annoy you?  When people boast about how many drugs they do , and continue to shout and go on about how fucking tough they are thinking that they are impressing someone when its only making them even more unpleasant to be around. I also hate when people dont talk to you in a conversation when you first meet them, normally because they think they are better than you


4. What did you want to be when you grew up? A playboy bunny, and when i hit 9th grade, a pornstar


5. What is your favorite time of the day? Dusk


6. What is the marital situation of your parents? together


7. How do you handle arguements/disagreements with other people? I voice my opinion and dont let anyone shut me down or talk over me. I stand up for what i believe in and  i will carry on an arguement for fucking days if i have to


8. Are you spiritual? I take beliefs from both various religions. Satanism is my new philosophy.


9. Name a physical trait you could change if you could: I want angelinga jolie's lips


10. Name one of your physical traits you really like: I have a perfect hourglass figure, and im still tiny


11. Name something you would like to do before you die: Travel the whole world


12. If you could go back to any point in time, where would you go? Ancient Greece


13. Have you ever experienced anything supernatural? Yes


14. Are you close tou your family memebers? Some more than others


15. Name some things in life that you are afraid of: Missing out on true love, not accomplishing enough, not living my life the way i want and compromising for other people. Mostly my biggest fear is dying without lieaving a lasting impression.


16. What is your biggest life issure right now? I have to name only one?

What do you like

1. colors: black, pink, red


2. scents: calivin klein euphoria, betsey johnson, pink sugar, victorias secret- love spell, anything that smells like coconuts, or shea butter.


3. tv channels: MTV is pretty chill sometimes. VH1


4. cars: volkswagen rabbit& the GTI, Dodge charger, Honda Fit, Sentra SE-R


5. snack foods: cooler ranch doritos, animal crackers, candy candy candy


6. beverages: ice tea, grape fruit juice, smoothies


7. game consoles:play station 2, nintendo 64


8. concerts: i prefer arena concerts, my favorite venue is PNC bank arts center


9. conversation topics: sex, religion, spirituality, current controversery


10. magazines: tattoo savage, vogue, rue morgue


11. flowers: eh


12. jewelry: big plastic things or realy expensive diamond pieces


13. resturants: LA caverna( NYC), the rainforest cafe. Im also a sucker for little ambient vegan resturants


14.  websites: godsgirls.com, cuteoverload.com


15. vacation spots: greece, san antonio Texas


16. museums: the museum of sex (NYC), the museum of natural history(NYC)


17. stores: victorias secret, forever 21, spencers, charlotte russe


18. out door activities: beach days, horseback riding, swimming, backyard baseball, water gun fighhts, skinny dipping

Do you like

1. seafood? certain types


2. sushi? mhm


3. mexican food? have to be in the mood sometimes but mainly yes


4. italian food? stuffed shells<3


5. chinese food? yes yes yes


6. japanse food? eh


7. german food? yes


8. greek food? my favorite <3


9. mongolian food?  havent tried it, but i definately would like to


10. barbecue? eh, does throwing a hotdog on the grill count?


11. cajun? not really


12. soul food? yes


13. vegan food? mmmm :)


14. cake? yes please


15. cheese? american only


16. jalapenos?no


17. aritchokes? no


18. salad? depends


19. rabbit? no :(


20. duck?nooooo:(


21. bison? ew no


22. lamb? im guilty :/  i cant be blamed! im greek!

do you play

1. baseball? yes


2. softball? yes


3. basketball? yes


4. football? not really


5. hockey? no


6. soocer? yes


7. monopoly? yes


8. chekcers? eh


9. chess? with my grandpa :)


10. scrabble? yes


11. trivial pursuit? yes but i suck


12. poker? no


13. guitar? used to


14. flute?no


15. piano? used to


16. horseback ride? yes <33
    

i went to the shelter today to try and find a kitten for my boyfriend for his birthday but i dont even feel like its fucking worth it lately. Its amazing how we try to make up these fantasy love stories in our head about each other when in reality we need to like wake the fuck up and realize its all bullshit. The sad thing is I found the perfect one for him to, black with green eyes just like he wanted. I dont even feel like its worth my time to go through with it anymore. Fuckit. Im so fucking tired of trying to be like the perfect girlfriend when im not even happy. Its fucking really sad.

shes awesome and i love herrrr :) check out the alt. modeling site that she runs, im pretty sure we have some godsgirls on there that are modelign for her as well <3 support !support !

showering than going to see my boyfriend todayyy :)  girls! i want to become friends with more of you ! reach out and talkkk i dont bite :)

and brw add my myspace my model specific page- myspace.com/xstaycoldx

so i decided i needed to make an updated list of shit i need to buy. besides my apartment im hopefully getting in the city sometime next spring/summer, I would like to make a list of new expensive things that wil be mine, because i like stuff, alot. After this im going to go make my fat ass some organic mac and cheese and watch on demand all day holla!

this weekend Im going upstate to spend the weekend with my boyfriend again, thats always fun :) im gunna try to convice him to go see stepbrothers with me, im craving rele buttery fattening movie theater popcorn. I also am debating on getting tickets for the Mayhem concert tour, anyone else going to that? Slipkot, Disturbed, Sucide Silence, The Red Chord, Walls Of Jericho, sounds pretty kick ass. i havent been to like a show in forever, and this seems like a nice comeback. Sunday me and the bf are gunna hopefully go down to the shore and take some pictures together :) i miss doing that with him. PIcnic on the beach sounds nice. i cant even begin to describe the amount of love and emotion i feel towards this kid. Hes my fucking world basically. Even though we fight sometimes, it dosent mean that i cant stand him, its just the mass amounts of stress we have both been dealing with. This weekend we are gunna toss the cellphones to the side and and reconnect, cuddle and watch movies together. Thats prettty much the plan. I went to costco the other day with my mom and we bought about 500 dollars worth of shit, so i will have an endless supply of goodies about my house for like another year. Now, about that mac and cheese, im thinking im changing my mind to a 3 cheese flatbread sandwich..or peanut butter and jelly. hmmmm

I also wanted to throw in some random pictures of my life in greece, my house there that was just finished being built turned out beautfully. My dad is also buying property in the town we live in in the main square, so he can build an apartment complex. I begged him to let me have one of the apartments and he said yes, just in case i want to take some time away from the house and the countryside. He is also looking into buying one of the store fronts on the water to start a resturant out. I think that would be an amzing idea :) My uncle has a resturant in Athens that we all chill at during the day and I would love to help my dad out starting his own place up because of the great experience's we had at my uncle's place.

the house:

this was taken in March when it was finished so the trees look all dead and gross, but the plans are to smooth out the land and build a pasture for horses and an inground pool thats fenced in possibly on the side of the house which is shown on the bottom of the picture. My dad also has an idea to build an aviary in the back where you can walk into. Hopefully all this will be finished by the end of september :)

the past few days have been pretty shitty. i made a new myspace account specifically for godsgirls but i doubt i am going to keep it up because already i am getting harassing messages from random "broxcore" dudes. Its fucking lame. One in particular whose myspace is

 http://profile.myspace.com/index.cfm?fuseaction=user.viewprofile&friendid=192924725

messaged me saying i am an internet slut because i chose to be apart of this web community, then continuing to tell me to go "get aids"

From: ..Mikeachusetts..
Date: Jul 30, 2008 1:58 PM


Does being naked on the internet make you happy? If it does you're a retard. get aids.

Ps you can't do better than gods girls. Gods girls are pathetic. Just as pathetic as suicide girls. Yet again. Get a real job.

my response-

From: ..Shea of Godsgirls. com..
Date: Jul 30, 2008 9:08 PM

lol well it seems you know they exsist so we are doing something right.
ok mikeachusettes lol?
and for your information, if you had any intelligence in you at all, you wouldnt use an ignorant statement such as "get aids".
if being naked on the internet is what i want to do with my life then more power to me, but im pretty sure ill end up in your dads DVD player one day :) lmao or better yet, yours.

i want those days back please :)