Moscow's journals

Bye bye everyone!! :)

I will be in LA July 18-22. Yay!

i cannot upload any pictures into my gallery. i don't have a profile picture. they aren't uploading. can someone help?

do i

a) wake up the boyfriend for sex RIGHT NOW?

or

b) hope he isn't tired tomorrow night?

answers expected in the next 5 minutes or i commit rape.

i weigh less than i did when i got out of the hospital 2 years ago. maybe it's the blonde hair, it's making me too dumb to remember to eat. (ha just kidding all you natural blondes, don't take offense please.) or maybe it's the 60 hr workweeks. maybe it's being really depressed and lonely.

who knows.

food tastes like cardboard and coffee tastes like oatmeal, so i drink a lot of coffee and smoke a lot of cigarettes.

i want to go to sleep for a couple days. i am really tired. i get 2 days off in a row on sunday. i am really excited.but i think. i'll probably end up back at my bar drinking. ugh.

i don't want to go to work today. i really really don't.

i am being forced into battle in the last place i should have to fight: my workplace. i am being pulled in two different directions between two different people. i am trying to keep my cool and just do my job, but when both parties, and both direct superiors to me insist upon fucking me over and placing me in the middle of their fucking stupid bullshit "war", leaving me as the brunt of their petty games and attacks on each other, my patience is beginning to wear thin and i'm running out sanity. i'd hit the bottle, but since i'm suffering from post concussion syndrome (diagnosed as of this evening) i've got a few months before that's going to happen.

so far as i can tell, one person wants me there to be their snitch, and the other person wants me gone because they don't like the person that hired me. i personally haven't done anything wrong, and other than the drama between these two idiots, i actually love the bar and it's patrons and i make decent money. i don't want to leave. so what the fuck am i supposed to do? because of the drama that occurred today, it cost me $100 out of pocket for something that was completely not my fault. all i wanted was to make my goddamn money and leave. i am not about picking sides and playing games. do what you want to do, just don't involve me. i just want to be switzerland for fuck's sake; make my living and go the fuck home.

if anyone has any suggestions or insight to this feel free to shout them out, because i'm at a complete fucking loss on this.

all my gallery photos went byebye when i tried to put a new profile pic up. and now i have no photos and none of my new ones will stay up after i upload them. rad. i r retarded at this shit.

what a raygay slow day. $65 dollars in sales and i made a whopping $20 in tips. i seriously sat on my ass all day. we had 6 customers and i smoked a whole pack of cigarettes. awesome.

in other news, it fucking hailed here tonight. and it was 64 degrees. amazing.

The bfs band is playing Warped Tour. I'm so happy for him :) Everyone go check them out: www. myspace.com/dearenemy