Livia's journals

okay maybe i am just bitter or pre-menstrual or something but man some things are really pissing me off.

first off, let me just say that i understand that this site costs quite a bit of money to be a part of, and that it would be nothing without the members.  that being said, the thing that people obviously seem to overlook is that it would also be nothing without the amazing models, staff, and especially not without annaliese.

new businesses are hell to establish, and yes it may feel like godsgirls has been around forever... but the fact is that it hasn't.  an alarming number of small businesses fail in their first few years, and yet annaliese has managed to ensure that godsgirls has prevailed.  this is an amazing feat, especially considering the fact that along with all the other hardships new businesses have to overcome, we have been fighting an ongoing battle against an alt-porn giant.

i know that most members joined the site simply for some t&a, but there is a lot more that this site has to offer, as a lot of you have i am sure grown to understand.  we are a family, and we trying to do something bigger than n00dz.  godsgirls started because there was something missing from the "other sites" out there, and instead of sitting back and hoping something better would come along, annaliese took the initiative to create it.  godsgirls is standing up for what the industry should be, fighting back against the shit that all the individuals that have gotten fucked over before couldn't fight against all on their own.

being a part of this site isn't just about what you get out of it, it is about supporting a belief and ensuring that there will keep on being an alternative to the alternative.  sometimes standing up for something means making sacrifices, especially at the beginning.  godsgirls right now is not what godsgirls should, could, and will be if we all keep doing all we can to help it through these hard times. 

what we keep forgetting is that we are all making these same sacrifices.

members, you are waiting for your lower prices, your better set quality, your favourite girls pro sets, and your new site features.  models, you are waiting for your pro shoots, your more substantial paycheques, your events, etc.  and annaliese, well, she is waiting for the time that she is able to get a little bit of her life back.

members, what you are forgetting is that we all feel the same way.  your concerns are our concerns.  we are all aware, we all understand, and we can all relate.  things are not happening because we are just stupid, oblivious, or just plain don't care; they are not happening because they can't happen right now.  we are in this because someday they will, and if we want to see it happen, we have to keep on supporting and keep on believing.

we need to start showing support to eachother during this process, we need to start appreciating all the diy sets that all us models put our proverbial blood, sweat, and tears into, and all the amazing girls that keep putting so much into this site despite some of them waiting months upon months to be able to shoot professionally.  these are all sacrifices. 

i don't know about anyone else, but i would take the site the way it is now over no site at all any day. 

 

 

 

the next two sets of mine that are going up (sooooon!) are probably like my favourites.  i will not say any more, but get stoked!

so i was having sort of a bummer day until my friend showed me this:


that made my day.

last night was fun for the most part, except some stupid issues i've got.  for the most part i am really happy with being single but lately i have been crushing on everyone.  there are so many beautiful, amazing people that you can't help it.  the thing is that i guess when i am happy being single i want other people to be as well, but everyone is hooking up and falling in love and i feel like i am always getting shafted.  when people fall in love they're bff's, and it's like, they share all this stuff that no one else shares, and it's like... i don't know.  i just miss having someone to be close to, and it's hard to see all the people you're close to finding that with other people.  makes you lonely, sometimes, i guess.

i cried in public last night, which was super lame.  i hate doing that, 'cause it makes a scene and everyone comes and hugs you and asks if you're okay, which is nice, but makes you feel like... you're crying for attention, you know? which sometimes is the truth, but that definitely wasn't the case last night.  i was embarassed. 

it's okay though, my issues are my own, and they're just things i have to deal with.

anyways, there were lots of beautiful people there last night.  i cut eddie's hair, and mike's hair, in amythia's bathtub.  eddie's hair looks super cute.  we got all gussied up and wore our new stop staring dresses that we bought shopping a few weekends ago.  i felt sexy and i think i looked it too, i wore red lipstick, which is very rare for me.  it's some of the "long wear" stuff, so i have partially red stained lips this morning, it's quite an attractive look, if i do say so myself.

i need to finish doing laundry, have a nap, and i think i am going out for dinner tonight with the young boy.

i have a headache, i think i am hungover.

oh, amythia's performance last night was absolutely beautiful, what a sexy little thing she is! and a wonderful host(ess?)

eddie fell asleep as soon as we got back to amythia's house, we tried to get her in on some diy action but she wouldn't hear of it.  marla, amythia, and i shot a giggly drunken 3 girl diy, it was actually photographed by a few different people with camera's, the main one being ex SG visha.  it was silly.

okay thats it.

oh, no it's not! on saturday i am shooting with a photog that i have been wanting to shoot with forever! i am stoked, i am gonna wear my new dress and be all sultry, and hopefully i will have some neat things to show you.

xo

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okay so this is sort of a serious question/commentary that i would like your opinion on.

i am curious how people feel about models and their weights.  i know that a lot of woman in general have issues with their weight, and that an invitable part of being female is weight fluctuation for many reasons, be it hormonal, emotional, lifestyle, etc.  it is generally a lot easier for women to gain weight than it is for men, and a lot harder for them to lose it.  we also have to view weight fluctution of models as a normal and expected thing as well.

i have heard of instances with girls gaining weight, and losing the confidence to model.  in my opinion, especially on sites like this, it is a girls personaity that really draws me to them, and their overall beauty.  i would much rather have a model stay on the site and continue to interact regardless of their physical changes, than see them disappear.

i myself am one of those women whose weight fluctuates a lot, and i do not feel that it is because of anything negative in my lifestyle.  i try hard to be healthy, and part of that is trying hard to view myself in a positive light.  for the most part i think i do a good job, but sometimes seeing pictures of yourself, or seeing other peoples reactions to your photos, can sometimes hinder the proces.

i guess my question to you is how do you honestly feel about a models weight? do you believe that a woman should have a certain body type in order to show it off? why or why not? do you think a girl should stop modelling if her body changes?

bah, i don't know, maybe this doesn't make sense.

i am having a weird day.

here is a random picture of my new hair and glasses, i will write something interesting later.

on myspace!

seriously, he has just swept me off my feet with a single comment:

"WoW!You look gooooooooooooood!!You
got a great!Body Baby!Where is Calgary.
Or Alberta. It's in Canada.
I would love to meet you. if you don't want commitment.Will have sex's.I know your Bi.You go both way's.I wouldn' mind having a three some.
I'll plessure you and your girlfriend while both of you plessure me. my Ex's was Bi.she was a white girl I meet her in College.Her and Ihad amazing sex's."

-

*swoon*

i had the best weekend , saturday i went shopping with eddie and marla and bought awesome stuff, then we went out for lunch and i had reallllllllllly good cheeseless pizza.

sunday i got to stare at eddie naked for hours on end, and boss her around a little bit.  i maybe even touched her bum...

we went for dinner again after that.

yesterday we went over to marla's house for burlesque rehearsal after i slept ALL DAY (til 5 pm, i dont even know how i did it)


ummmm what else

i really have to pee, and get ready for work.

love!

here is a list of things that are new:

- i have new glasses
- i got fake nails for the first time ever, i love them.
- i am really lucky and i have seen my two favourite hotties a bunch this week (eddie and marla, of course)
- i have been shopping too much, i love it
- i bought a month membership to a gym two days ago, i haven't had time to go yet... i am a little nervous.
- i may or may not be assisting with a certain member of the elite 8's professional photoshoot on sunday.  GUESS WHO.
- my computer at work died, they bought a new one and it got set up today, so starting tomorrow i don't have to deal with a piece of shit for 8 hours a day.  yes!
- i am trying to be more feminine, and have recently started getting into wearing jewellery.  i have bought some sweet necklaces.
- i keep wanting to video blog but i am always so tired and have no time.
- i just bought my plane ticket to vancouver for the end of april. i am sooooooooo excited.
- i have to wake up early tomorrow to go shopping with eddie and marla, i am going to be tiiiiiiiiiiiired.
- i have sunday and monday off, i can't wait.
- i love being so busy and hardly spending time on the internet, it is very refreshing.  i am really happy with the way life is going right now.
- this year we have actually been having spring-like weather for the past 3 weeks or so straight, it's gorgeous, and really making me happy.  i can't wait for warmer weather, i think this summer will be amazing.  remember how bummed out i was for so long? this rules.
- i love you guys.

i am tired so i will leave you with some random pictures, and head to bed.


my hedgehog sophie is adorable


my bffl eddie is adorable.


this is me naked wearing my new glasses.

<33333333333 livia

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