CAGE
interview byErin
Considering I'm stuck in a van with these boys (Cage, Yak Ballz & Slow Suicide Stimulus) for a month I figured I might as well take care of some business and ask them some of my ridiculously awesome questions (which I'm sure don't even phase them as being ridiculous because they know me).
Cage, originating from upstate New York has been living in and around the NYC area for the past 4 - 5 years. The last album release 'Hell's Winter' was released in September 2005 and went over quite well with the masses. Guest appearances on the album include Jello Piafra (Dead Kennedy's) and Daryl Palumbo (Head Automatica & Glassjaw). Currently writing another album - 'Depart from Me' to be released at the end of 2007 on Def Jux.
Somewhere on the Florida turnpike I comprised some questions and passed my computer back to Cage to answer. Currently on the 'I Hate It' tour of the east coast and some middle america, these were the answer's he had for me:
Erin - State your name
Cage - Cage or Chris Palko or asshole as you like to call me.
Erin - Explain what the word "dude" means to you in 5 words.
Cage - a random human with penis
Erin - So, do you find joy in hiding special secrets like Brainiac from your fans?
Cage - yup
Erin - Word on the street is you're writing a new record. Do you think this one will please the masses?
Cage - yes it is called "Depart from Me" and god, I hope not.
Erin - Lions, Tigers or Bears?
Cage - hyenas... lions and tigers are pussies and we all know what bears are.
Erin - What's one thing you will never leave home when you go on tour?
Cage - Victoria my british speaking GPS and my lucky fetus foot.
Erin - If you were getting chased by some ninja on a motorcycle who wanted to kill you, how would you deal with the situation?
Cage - I would probably hit him in the head with a blowgun, one shot... dead.
Erin - I certainly hope there isn't a blowgun in the van that I don't know about.
Erin - Do you have any experience with this thing they call the 'dental dam'? If yes, how do you feel about it?
Cage - thats for eating dirty vaginas right? A waste of oil. I just use my finger.
Erin - Will you get in contact with the creators of South Park and convince them Kate & I need to be the new voices for Terrence & Phillip?
Cage - No Katie is Alaskan not Canadian.
Erin - I still think it's a good idea, we'd probably be better than the two they have on there now.
Erin - Planning on making it out to the west coast any time soon?
Cage - yes for the launch of the new record I will hit the west for sure 'random human with penis'.
Erin - If you make it back to Toronto any time soon will you put my mother on your guest list?
Cage - I'll put her on something.
Erin - I'm mildly disturbed by that comment.
Erin - "if he ever hurts you, true love, wont desert you" - name those lyrics.
Cage - That went over my head.
Erin - I thought we shared musical taste. Those are the lyrics from a little Journey song called 'Who's cryin' now'. I think it makes me sad that you didn't know that.
Erin - I just broke my headphones watching Govone and Glue sing & dance along to "Take On Me", how do you feel about that?
Cage - i wanted to stick my head out of the moving van and suck pavement.
Erin - in a good way?
Cage - as good as the highway could shred my jaw to pieces
Erin - anything you feel like talking about while Istill have you locked in the van somewhere in Florida?
Cage - not much else except the CupCake dvd (to be released spring 2007) is really disturbing and I Hate It! xo
What a perfect time to end, 15 miles away from Orlando, Florida, many inside jokes, pee stop's and cigarette breaks later it's time to soundcheck. Tune in for more interview's from the rest of the boy's on the "I Hate It" tour and more of my magical humor.
- The End -
